Are you thinking of magicking someone into loving you? Don’t! Here’s why you shouldn’t do a love spell on a specific person, and what to do instead.
“Whom you seek to imprison you do not love.”
~ A Course in Miracles
Look, I know it can be tempting.
But casting a love spell on a specific person is not only unethical, it will also very likely totally suck for you in the long run.
Of course, if you’re in the throes of limerence, it may be difficult to imagine what could possibly suck so much about the person you’re crushing on feeling the same way about you. Well then, let me paint you some pictures.
Do love spells work? Yes. And can you cast a love spell to attract someone awesome? Absolutely. But just don’t cast a love spell on a specific person.
Here’s why: ultimately, when you do a love spell on a specific person, there are no good outcomes. Rather, there are three main ways it could go very wrong.
(For everything you need to know about the dynamics of ethical and successful love magic, check out my book, Little Guide to Love Magic: Everything You Need to Know, Including Love Spells.)
The First Way a Love Spell Could Go Wrong
You know that what you send out energetically always comes back to you in some form, right? So in this scenario, when you cast the love spell, you cast it on yourself, too. That spell flies right back at you like a boomerang. So now, you both become magically, unnaturally obsessed with the other. Then you get into a really sticky, codependent, basically awful relationship. Maybe it involves violence. At the very least it involves emotional abuse, because overriding someone else’s free will is in itself a form of emotional abuse. So you put that in the mix when you did the spell, and now it’s there. And you’re stuck in the mire of that love spell like a swamp. Any healthy, fun, beautiful relationships you may have had aren’t even a possibility anymore, at least until you do some major magical damage control and extricate yourself from this mess. So don’t do it!
The Second Way a Love Spell Could Go Wrong
In this scenario, you cast a love spell on a specific person, and that person indeed appears to fall hopelessly in love with you. And…darn: now that they’re acting so foolish, they’re not attractive to you anymore. In addition to making this person miserable, now they also won’t leave you alone. Not to mention, as in scenario 1 (above), since you overrode some else’s free will by casting a spell on them, you’re going to have to deal with some karmic backlash.
The Third Way a Love Spell Could Go Wrong
The best case scenario, but still a bad one, is that you cast a spell on someone, and that unlucky someone successfully resists the magical pull to enter into a relationship with you. But your spell still boomerangs back and hits you, so you pine for this person much longer than you otherwise would have. You’ve now cast a spell of unhappiness on yourself. Until it wears off or the spell is successfully broken, this presents a challenge to your moods, your ability to focus, and any other romantic relationships you are (or may have otherwise been) involved with.
What to Do Instead of Casting a Love Spell on Someone
As I mentioned above, you can still do a love spell! Just not a love spell on a specific person.
You can’t go wrong when you do a spell to draw ideal romantic conditions and leave the actual person up to the universe. Because if the object of your affection happens to be an ideal partner for you right now, your spell might end up working on them after all! …But if it doesn’t, that just means someone even more perfect for you is on his or her way. So there’s obviously no question that this is the way to go.
If you liked this post, you’ll love my book, Little Guide to Love Magic: Everything You Need to Know, Including Love Spells.
Looking for an ethical love spell? Way to go – good choice! Here are some to choose from:
5 Karma-Friendly Alternatives to Putting a Love Spell on Someone
Love Spell to Attract a Divine Partner
I can’t believe i’ve come to a point where casting love spells became an option.. I still love my ex boyfriend and I truly believe he still loves me too, i can feel it.. but we don’t know how to re-connect or reconcile. I haven’t spoken to him in 3 months, I think about him 24/7 non-stop everyday it’s really exhausting.. He’s the stubborn and egoistic type, he doesn’t want to go back on his word even though his heart tells him otherwise. I have been practicing the law of attraction, but today i stumbled across this website and I felt the need to try,
The reason i’m so firm on holding on is because i believe, with a gut feeling that we are soulmates. when i am with him, i feel a deep love feeling like never before. we meditate together, we talk about deep personal things that gave deep personal connections.
I feel like i lost a part of me. I have been focusing on myself for the past 3 months however, I want to love myself more than ever before, I believe that I am the source of my own happiness, not him.
Will love spells work if I know deep down that we are meant to be, but we are both afraid to try again? Will it encourage him to come and look for me?
Hi Sarah! Please check out the 5 Karma-Friendly Alternatives to Casting a Love Spell on Someone Else below the post. As long as you don’t do a love spell specifically on a certain person, you can help bring about the best possible outcome for yourself and everyone involved, which may or may not include this ex-boyfriend specifically.
Will I ever get back with my ex love. I want to try a love spell on him. His name is Robert. Thank you
Will I ever get back with my ex love. I want to try a love spell on him. His name is Robert.
Hi my name is sofia and I’m 15. I like this boy a lot but I’m not around him that much so I put a couple of spells on him. A desire me spell, a love me spell, and a dream of Me spell. I am completely ashamed of what I did and how my emotions got the best of me but I still want to see him and want him to like me back. The spells have been somewhat of a success since I get to see him walk or ride his bike by my house often and always looks towards me even though I am far away from him. Also I can’t stop thinking about him. Do you know what I should do? Is there a way to either undo or break those spells I put on him?
Sofia, I’d like to congratulate you on wanting to set things right. First, if you have any remnants of the spells you cast (charms, candles, etc.), release those by recycling, composting, or throwing in the trash. Then do the Lemon Cure from this post: https://tesswhitehurst.com/5-awesome-ways-to-break-a-hex-or-a-curse/
Hi,
The last few months I have been in a very confusing relationship full of ups and downs, but also lots of love. I am 18 and this was my first relationship. The man involved is 7 years older than me. We started as friends but from there things moved very slowly, first holding hands, going on dates, and finally after three months we kissed. The kiss came after we had a conversation. I asked if we were more than friends. He became awkward and explained that the age difference was too much and he felt uncomfortable. So we remained friends but after only two days he said he could not not act romantic towards me. When we did kiss it was passionate and real and evident that there was a strong love connection. Unfortunately after a short month of being intimate, he began to stray away. He blamed this on his mental health and again my age, and I promised to be there to support him. Well now we are just friends, because there is another issue. When we met he was engaged but unhappy. He chose to leave his longterm partner, that’s when we became romantic. But now that we are just friends he is returning to her. He says he has no feelings for her but it’s a weird situation and he is confused. He still wants to be in my life because we have built a great relationship. We have become best friends, we never fight, and we alway have fun. But I am struggling with this. I know that he still loves me, he is unable to deny it when I ask. When we touch there is still magic. The issue is that he is a professional at repressing his feelings. I am worried because I really care for and love him. He is reentering an unhappy relationship for the sake of comfort, instead of following his heart. Is there a spell to bring him back to me romantically, since we are still best friends? I don’t need a love spell because he already loves me in that way. I just need something that will help him follow his heart and stop repressing his feelings. All I want is happiness for both of us and at this point we are both very sad.
Thank You
Morgan, I’m sorry you are sad. I am getting the sense that the healthiest thing for both of you would be for you to release him and let him go his own way. Even if you think he is making the wrong decision, it is still his decision to make. Also, when you do this, you will have the best chance of him returning to you on his own (if it is meant to be). I suggest a cord cutting ritual, and also letting go of reminders of him in your home and environment. Here’s a ritual to cut cords: https://tesswhitehurst.com/ritual-to-cut-cords-of-attachment/ And here’s a post about how to arrange your environment for the best possible outcomes and experiences in your love life: https://tesswhitehurst.com/the-9-best-feng-shui-tips-for-love-and-romance/
Thanks for the reply. I agree that the relationship wasn’t the healthiest and I need to accept his decision. I just feel that it was meant to be and I do have a feeling he will come back.I have a question about the cord cutting ritual. Will it completely cut him from my life? Because I do not want that. I live in a very rural area and he is my only friend at the moment, which will change when i go to college in the fall. We are intending on staying best friends and hanging out everyday this summer, so i don’t want to cut him off. I also don’t want to cut myself out of his life and the possibility of finding eachother again. But I do think it would be beneficial if he was out of my thoughts. Is that what the cord cutting does?
Also concerning getting rid of reminders: That is kind of an issue since almost everything I own reminds me of him. I made the mistake of letting him fully into my life, so most of my possessions have a memory associated with him. We also have very similar interests, so now all my my favorite shows and books remind me of the times we shared watching them. When I enter my own bedroom I immediately imagine the memories we shared together here, so i feel it is impossible to get away from him.
Then maybe for now just do the cord cutting ritual and do your best to move on from your relationship with him.
Morgan, cutting cords doesn’t cut healthy connections or love, only unhealthy/unwanted aspects of the connection.